I'm partly feeling sorry for myself, but honestly wanting advice here. It's about parenting. We are in a really hard spot right now, and I feel as though I'm getting it all wrong. My oldest two girls don't listen to me. At all. No, I mean they completely ignore every sound that comes out of my mouth. Forget following instructions, at this point I'd settle for acknowledgement of my existence beyond "Get me some juice". We had a disastrous shopping trip this morning, and I am feeling extremely discouraged. What am I doing wrong? They listen to everyone else in their life - they behave well for anyone else, except for me. It's so hard not to take it personally, when it feels so...personal. I don't know what the answer is, except to keep trying.
M isn't herself either. She's teething, and so isn't feeding properly, and she's had an allergic reaction to something - It could be a few different things, like latex, or peanuts (I ate some peanut butter the other day). So I feel like a failure there too - I mean honestly, all she needs from me is milk and clean pants, with some affection. And I've stuffed even those few things up.
I'm tired from broken sleep, irritable from being screamed at by children, weary from repeating the same instructions a hundred times, defeated by hearing "NO!" a thousand times a day, and generally just feeling like I'm never enough for anyone, no matter what I do. I'm ineffective in just about everything these days, and it feels awful. My goal for this year was to be a better steward of everything - and so far, it's an epic fail on all fronts.
I know that there are others facing far worse problems right now, but in this moment? I just feel absolutely shaken, defeated, and weak. Thankful for my life, but useless at managing it. Any suggestions on how to manage money, discipline, time, health, housework, with 3 children aged 4 and under are totally welcome. Prayers even more so. Or even just some chocolate would help a little.
XO,
Sarah
2 kind words:
you are a GREAT mother!! remember that always. 4 has been a terribly challenging year in our house. what has worked the best is frequent time outs in his bed (for only a few minutes until everyone calms down...otherwise you run the risk of having the entire room torn apart). we have also made a chart with 5 different goals on it. at the end of each day he is given a sticker for each goal he has met. it has been a great way to talk about various issues...like crying because a toy isn't working and sharing. on fridays he is given a coin for each sticker he received through the week. he is saving up for a power ranger toy. it has been a slow journey but it is finally starting to sink in and we are in a much better place than we were 2 months ago.
This too shall pass...at least we hope so.
They are missing something, but I may not be something you can offer. Reasoning? I doubt that will help, time, persistance, discipline, structure, and love.
And lots of chocolate (for you!!)
Hang in there...college is coming.
UP
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